Commitment

Dealing With Illness In A Marriage

Hindu marriage ceremony from a Rajput wedding.

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It’s not unusual for a family to have some bad times that cause a change in their routines. Sometimes, this situation may lead to a beneficial turning point. If your spouse gets sick – possibly a severe or chronic illness – you should have some strategies to help you cope.  You know that times like this will be most difficult for you.

As per report published in the Journal of the American Health Association, some forms of chronic illness like diabetes or ulcer likely affect nearly half of the U. S population. Dealing with chronic illness has negative implications; this applies to both the person who is ill and the people around him or her.  Chronic illness has the potential to destroy a marriage. Statistics show that about 75% of marriages get shaken when health problems enter the picture.

For your marriage to be able to cope with the circumstances, you need to be prepared for the peripheral effects of chronic illness in the household. First, you will have to accept this reality of life: People get sick.

Possible Effects Of Chronic Illness On Your Marriage:

  • Financial Problems – Because of medical bills and medication expenses, the couple’s resources might get depleted.
  • Frustration – Some couples don’t know how to handle pressures or just feel overwhelmed by them.  They may get frustrated about the situation.
  • Denial – To cope with certain difficult times, some people go through a process of convincing themselves that what’s happening isn’t true or that it will merely pass.
  • Sexual and Intimacy Issues – Because one spouse is physically incapable, the sexual and intimate side of marriage is neglected, resulting to what may be termed as a “platonic relationship.” Marriage has now become pure companionship.
  • Parenting Concerns

If a couple faces a crisis, naturally, their children will be affected not only financially but emotionally. The situation is made worse if the children are very young and don’t fully understand what’s happening.

Some Tips On How To Cope

  • No matter what, keep the love alive. Don’t fall out of love with your spouse just because he or she is ill. Remember your wedding vows.
  • Pursue things that revive your faith, your spirit, and your convictions. You need to be strong.
  • Go on with your life despite the fact that your spouse is sick. This doesn’t mean that you stop taking care of him or her.

All the challenges you’re facing will have some potential to affect you positively or negatively.  Although some circumstances are beyond your control, basically you still have the choice on how you’re going to react to the situation. It isn’t easy “trying to be strong” when you feel like falling apart, but it’s one of the most effective ways to survive. Other people “accommodate” their problems in a sense. That is, they don’t fight them but just “yield to the wind” so they don’t end up broken. Having expectations is good. Having realistic expectations is better.

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Posted by Marvellous Marriage - November 4, 2017 at 5:16 AM

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Helpful tips for someone wondering “can my marriage be saved?”

Helpful tips for someone wondering “can my marriage be saved?”

Can my marriage be saved

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Today more than any other time in the history of marriage, the rate of divorce has multiplied to some unbelievable levels. There is an increased concern from all quarters as people ask the question “can my marriage be saved?” almost every day. The institution of marriage seems to be in trouble today more than any other time in history. It is important to understand that any marriage can be saved if only the two people involved are willing to have it healed.

Have you been asking how “can my marriage be saved?” Well, there are numerous things that you should understand if this is the situation you are in. Below are some of the things that you should consider:

Can my marriage be saved by admitting that I need help?

To begin with, you must never shy away from admitting that your marriage is in deep trouble and that you need help. A spouse who has this question in their mind would want things to appear normal from outside but the truth of the matter is that this does not help in any way. The first step towards the healing of your marriage does not lie in just wondering “can my marriage be saved?” but in what you do after this question has risen in your mind.

Your marriage can be saved by working together with your spouse.

Never assume that things will work themselves out miraculously. Many people normally bury their heads in the sand ignoring or totally pretending that the problem will disappear on its own. You must come up with a plan that includes identifying the problem and how to go about it. It must be noted, however, that this is not an easy thing to do. It is, however, also worth noting that divorce is not the easiest thing to do. If you can’t solve the issue on your own, then discuss seeking a counsellor’s help in order to save you marriage.

Marriage can be saved by understanding that your marriage is heading towards divorce

Those asking “can my marriage be saved” normally do so after having suffered for too long and are almost on the brink of divorce. It is important to agree that the problem is not one-sided; it involves the two people in the marriage and therefore, the solution can only come from the two. Pointing fingers and the blame game is not the way to go and each spouse should look deep within themselves to see their contribution to the problem. Be flexible and seek to make things better by compromising during the solution seeking moments.

Many who have been wondering how “can my marriage be saved?” normally lack the patience to deal with issues amicably. Many normally see divorce as the better way, but the truth of the matter is that this is more painful than humbling through the process of healing. Repairing a marriage in trouble takes more than a few hours and patience is of great importance. You must give full attention to the process.

Can my marriage be saved by asking for professional help?

Professional help from a pastor or counsellor is also important if you are wondering “how can my marriage be saved?” and especially if the problems are more than you can handle between the both of you. The involvement of a third party should come as one of the last things you do.

It is important to note that every marital problem can be solved instead of ending in divorce. There is never a perfect spouse and leaving your spouse for another person will only be like jumping from a pan into a flame of fire. With patience, you will find that the power to answer the question on “how can my marriage be savedlies within you and your spouse.

 

 

 

 

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Posted by Marvellous Marriage - October 19, 2017 at 5:18 AM

Categories: Can A Marriage Be Saved?, Causes Of Divorce, Causes Of Marital Failure, Commitment, Common Marital Problems, Developing Healthy Relationships, Healthy Marriage Tips, Let's Go Together, Loving Your Marriage, Making Marriage Work, Resolving Conflicts In A Marriage, Restoring Trust In A Marriage, Save My Marriage Tips   Tags: , , , , , ,

Workable suggestions for marriage reconciliation after separation

Workable suggestions for marriage reconciliation after separation

Marriage reconciliation after separation

Family is one of the most important institutions which normally find challenges. There are times when couples are forced to separate due to problems between themselves and this is done for a number of reasons. It is important to work out marriage reconciliation after separation for the sake of peace and the well-being of the whole family. Separation as previously mentioned is done for a number of reasons which include:

  • Allowing both parties sometime to cool down and be able to look at the situation soberly.
  • To allow the couple to weigh their position in the relationship on an individual level.
  • To help the couple decide whether they are interested in settling things amicably.

 

What to do if one party is not willing to go on with marriage reconciliation after separation

In case the parties are willing to reconcile as many normally do, the couple is able to have a fresh start in the marriage and overcome the various challenges that could have led them to their separation. It is always the hope of all concerned parties that the couple will be able to work out reconciliation after separation and enjoy a happy marriage thereafter.  Separation and reconciliation is a process that is double pronged and should be approached with openness. There are various steps that the couple must be willing to take in order for the marriage reconciliation after separation to work well.

 

Valuable suggestions on the steps to follow to make reconciliation after separation successful

  • If marriage reconciliation after separation is to work, the couple must make the decision together. This should not be a decision made by one party on behalf of the other spouse and must not be forced. Even if the decision to separate was made by one party who decided to walk away, the reconciliation will have to involve a joint decision for it to succeed.
  • Each spouse must be able to acknowledge the role they played for the problem to arise if marriage reconciliation after separation is to succeed. This must be done without accusations and counter-accusations if the healing process is to begin. The spouses must be willing to approach the process with an open heart and be sincere for the sake of their marriage. Sometimes this will be tough and painful and will require that each partner swallow their pride, but the truth is that it must be done for the marriage reconciliation after separation to work.
  • After the acknowledgement of their role, each partner must be willing to ask for forgiveness from the other party. This should be followed by each of them pointing out how they intend to approach things differently in order to relate well.
  • Mostly, the problems that caused the separation do not disappear overnight. There is a need to come up with a reconciliation plan, stating a road map to be followed in order for the couple to reconcile. Some of the habits or things that caused the separation might be tough to deal with, but there must be sacrifice and a clear plan on how to do things differently if the marriage reconciliation after separation is to bear fruit. These steps should be reviewed to know whether the couple is succeeding.
  • The couple should also consider recommitting themselves to each other and this can be done by repeating the wedding vows as a sign of dedication to the marriage. This should come from the heart.

The marriage reconciliation after separation is not a walk in the park and each spouse must be willing to pay the necessary price.

 

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Posted by Marvellous Marriage - April 18, 2012 at 9:00 AM

Categories: Can A Marriage Be Saved?, Causes Of Divorce, Causes Of Marital Failure, Challenges Of Interracial Marriages, Commitment, Common Marital Problems, Common Mistakes Interfaith Couples Make, Dos and Don'ts for Interracial Married Couples   Tags: , , , ,